This is for any parent who has ever had to sit through an ‘assessment’ on their child.
For every parent who has had developmental milestones clearly spelt out for them and been told their child fits outside of the normal parameters.
For every parent who has sat through an ‘indivualised education plan’ meeting, appearing as their child’s advocate as best they know how.
That’s never easy, not even for those who have walked this road for years.
The size of your child’s gap between what’s considered ‘normal’ and where they actually are, doesn’t actually reflect how big or small your feelings towards this situation could or should be.
Feelings are feelings, reality is reality.
What you have to shoulder each and every day, is no light load.
The grief you may face, knowing your child’s future will quite likely be rather different to their siblings realities, and the hopes and dreams you may have had for them, have had to morph into something different, to your early dreams for them.
I don’t know what challenges you face in your daily life. I don’t how how hard you have to fight to keep a smile on your face, to keep one foot walking in front of the other. I suspect that you rarely get a break, that sometimes people don’t know how or what to say to you, that you’re used to living in a constant state of exhaustion.
However there are parts of your story that I do know. I suspect if you were to sit me down and share your heart with me, I have an inkling that there are certain things you’d want to make crystal clear for me.
I think you would freely share that even though the tiredness is never-ending, there are still snippets of joy and of hope in your days.
I suspect you’d say that yes the appointments, assessments, meetings and therapies are ongoing and are costly in more than one way, but you’ve come to realize that these professionals are (mostly) on the same team as you, with your child’s best interests truly at heart.
I reckon you’d state, with eyes blinking away the tears, because you’re real and you’re raw, that you’ve come to find the delightful in the different. You see that what sets your child apart from others in how they see the world, or how the world sees them, and you can find some true delight in that.
And isn’t that the thing that makes every parent’s heart swell, in each and every child ? Your child is delightful. Your child has a purpose, your child has a place to belong, your child has unique giftings and talents and abilities.
Your child may well be different, but often, that’s the true beginning of real delight.